I have always believed that so much more comes from focusing on one's strengths and letting the weaknesses slide by rather than obsessing over the weaknesses. Of course I also believe that when you FIND a weakness (like my inability to live in big cities), and you can turn it into a strength (as I am working on daily, living in a big city), you double your goodness, double your "godness", and increase your signature strengths.
The difference can be sublime some times, as some may then ask, "So should I just ignore my weakpoints? Is that what you're saying, Cam?" The answer to that is a definite NO. But the difference lies in how you leverage it. Do you want to dwell on your weaknesses and think that they are holding you back? If you continue to focus on them that way, they will continue to hold you back. And the negative will become bigger than the positive. But by focusing on working on your weaknesses, overcoming your ego's VERY STRONG DESIRE to keep you mediocre, you can increase your signature strengths. (even though you may THINK that your ego isn't doing that... well, ego hates change, and improvement means changing habits to better habits, and that change is resisted by ego. Strongly).
Take my weakness for big cities all these years; it kept me thinking negative things about Tokyo, and kept me from enjoying the weekend outings Mayu and I had over the two decades together. Was that good? Of course not! So now, what I am doing is making the change to make that weakness a signature strength.
Here's something you can take to the bank, from Philospher's Notes...
As my lunch bag says, "Do one thing every day that scares you". Turn a weakness into a strength by changing it. That's pretty scary, but if you step into your fear, you are bound to become stronger, free yourself a little bit more from your ego's iron vice grip, and increase your compassion and love for those around you.
I love you! - Cam
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“I do not believe that you should devote overly much effort to correcting your weaknesses. Rather, I believe that the highest success in living and the deepest emotional satisfaction comes from building and using your signature strengths.” ~ Martin Seligman from Authentic Happiness
There’s Martin Seligman’s brilliant book, Authentic Happiness, in a nutshell. (Have you taken his free signature strengths assessment yet?!? What’re you waiting for?!!? www.authentichappiness.com ! :) )
Another one of my favorite books on the science of happiness is by a guy amed Robert Sternberg. In Successful Intelligence, he introduced us to this idea that we shouldn’t spend too much time on our weaknesses. His research showed that the most successful among us aren’t those with the highest IQs or SAT’s or GPA’s. The most successful are those who know who they are, what they’re good at and they rock those strengths—spending just enough time to make sure their weaknesses didn’t kick their butt and the rest of the time developing their strengths. Powerful stuff.
Research speaks LOUDLY that we need to figure out what our strengths are and use them often.
So, what are your strengths? What are you great at? What do you most enjoy doing? (Good news is that they all usually go together. :)
Before you cruise over to the web site to take the “Signature Strengths” test at www.authentichappiness.com , let’s take a first pass at self-identifying your greatest strengths, shall we?!?
My greatest strengths are:
1. __________________________
2. __________________________
3. __________________________
4. __________________________
5. __________________________
“You could say that I worked every minute of my life, or you could say with equal justice that I never worked a day. I have always subscribed to the expression “Thank God it’s Friday,” because to me Friday means I can work for the next two days without interruption.” ~ John Hope Franklin
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“The good life consists in deriving happiness by using your signature strengths every day in the main realms of living. The meaningful life adds one more component: using these same strengths to forward knowledge, power, or goodness. A life that does this is pregnant with meaning, and if God comes at the end, such a life is sacred.” ~ Martin Seligman from Authentic Happiness
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